Tuesday, August 20, 2013

Legal: Thai Iced Tea with Boba

-The end of conservative America looks like this apparently.-

So this weekend I didn't do much cooking. I was too busy getting married. You may recall last year that my husband Brian and I had a rather lovely wedding. Here's what though, that was just a ceremony. At the time we were unable to make it legal due to Prop 8 - the proposition that banned gay marriage in California - still being in play.

Well, now it's not thanks to some very smart lawyers and a civil-minded Supreme Court ruling.

So Brian and I went to the courthouse on our one year anniversary and tied the knot again.

It was a simple thing, we paid a fee, filled out some forms, brought some witnesses, and a had a quick five minute ceremony where we exchanged rings under an awning that had seen untold couples exchange vows under a cloud of silk flowers.

And now we're legally married in the eyes of the state and the federal government.

-A beautiful boutonniere from our friend and florist, Shannon.- 

For some this may not seem like a big thing, but for us it's huge. If you don't support gay marriage let me explain why this was so important to my husband and me. We are now eligible for survivor's benefits, we don't have to testify against one another in court, we will not be unfairly taxed, we can visit each other in the hospital, if we have children they will now be protected, and not possibly sent to a foster home instead of their other rightful guardian, we are now eligible for family medical leave, and a host of other rights. Before we would have been denied all of this.

What could possibly be so offensive about this? And if you quote religion, well religion has nothing to do with taxable income, does it? (Except that churches/temples/etc. don't get taxed, which I think is bogus considering many are so politically active.)

So yes, we're married.

At the courthouse we saw scores of gay and lesbian couples tying the knot and as each one took their vows rounds of applause filled the room. The poor city workers were incapable of answering the phones of the raucous joy that swelled with each "I do."

-Best. Anniversary. Ever.-

You know what didn't happen?

The world didn't end.

No one's marriage was demeaned.

No conservative people were fired or threatened.

No children were traumatized.

God didn't send a plague or a storm. (And for those of you who say God does these things because of gay marriage and not, say, because of human trafficking or child prostitution are awful and worship a  God so petty I imagine he also pokes blasphemer's with a cancer stick and ties tin cans to the tails of stray dogs.)

There was only love in that room.

-Love, and a lot of people in suits and white dresses.-

And money, because a state worker told us of the huge spike of revenue seen in marriage licenses. A photographer echoed she had booked eight more jobs this year. A bride said her sister, a cake decorated, was turning people away due to too many inquiries and a full calendar. My wedding planner has already booked her first lesbian wedding.

It seems gay marriage will help save the economy through tiered cakes and tasteful bridesmaid dresses.

Anyways, the next day we celebrated a quiet morning married with thai iced tea and cuddling in bed with a kindle re-reading Jeff Long's, The Descent together.

Here's to marriage.

Garrett (and Brian) out.


Thai Iced Tea with Tapioca Pearls (aka Boba)
The recipe I used came from Todd and Diane of White on Rice. I won't reprint it here so just go check them out. As for the boba?

Measure a cup of large tapioca pearls. Bring 8 cups of water to a boil. Add the boba and stir for a few minutes until the boba plump up and rise to the surface. Simmer at medium heat for 5 minutes. Strain out and allow to come to room temperature. You may want to sprinkle them with a bit of sugar and water so they don't stick to each other so fiercely. Place into tall glasses and fill with ice and thai iced tea or other favorite drink. Easy peasy.

47 comments:

  1. Brought tears to my eyes! Congratulations, again! And thank you for sharing.

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  2. And here's to many, many more anniversaries! Congratulations!

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  3. Congratulations!! So happy for you both, glad you finally got to make it legal. :))

    I've never seen tapioca pearls in its "raw" form before. We get it in bubble tea, but it's supposed to be carcinogenic and incredibly unhealthy. Will probably go look for those, now!

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  4. Congratulations on making it legal! That is awesome. I had the privilege of being a witness as my dad and stepdad tied the knot under that same awning back in ʻ08 (before Prop 8 was passed); theyʻd been together 23 years at that time. I also remember seeing them go through and sign off on a huge stack of legal documents--living wills, advanced medical directives, affidavits of domestic partnership, durable power of attorney, etc. etc.--in an effort to cobble together an approximation of the multitude of legal and economic benefits conferred automatically on het couples who get married. It still was not the same thing and I was glad to see the Supreme Courtʻs decision this past June!

    Hereʻs Dad and Steve speaking out on the issue just before this yearʻs Pride, if youʻd like to meet them ;) http://fox40.com/2013/06/14/sacramento-preparing-for-gay-pride-celebration/

    PS--Shannon did the flowers for my wedding as well; she is incredible and her arrangements were gorgeous, better even than I had envisioned!

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  5. Congratulations!!! This makes my heart happy. ♥

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  6. Yay! Congrats! Love seeing how happy you both look. Those are some great, huge smiles. It makes me smile too. :)

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  7. It makes me ill to think the injustice to so many people.

    Add to the fact that the State of California, had it been one of the first back in 2008, would have made billions in revenue over the last few years. After all, CA is vacation destination state. How might that have benefited the economy over these last turbulent fiscal years? How many jobs and livelihoods might have been saved by this one SIMPLE thing?

    Sigh. I must let it go. We must now just rejoice that a great wrong has been righted.

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  8. Congratulations! And what a beautiful post: serious and funny, full of love and honesty.

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  9. Congratulations!! That's so wonderful and I'm so happy for you both!

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  10. YEEEESSSSSSS! About freaking time CA got their sh*t together on gay marriage (my home state so I feel fully entitled to say that). Congratulations! So happy for you and Brian!

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  11. Congratulations!

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  12. Yay!!! Congratulations!! What a great weekend for you :)

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  13. What a beautiful post! I am so happy for you guys that you are legally official as well as personally! <3

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  14. Congratulations! I am lucky enough to live in a state (NH) that recognized my marriage. But, as you said, the recent supreme court ruling on DOMA made a huge difference on the federal side of things for benefits and taxes.
    It is amazing to see these changes happening, and really, happening so quickly. When I first came out 20+ years ago I never ever thought I would be able to open and out at work and in my general life, I assumed it would always be a close knit group that knew *the truth*. I certainly never thought I would be a legally married.
    Thank you for continuing to share your story. Your stories and your beautiful gift of storytelling have helped all of us to have such wonderful freedoms.

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  15. I do not have words to properly express my happiness for you so - congratulations and wishing you many years of joy and happiness together. But I do have one thing to disagree on - 'tasteful' bridesmaid dresses?? I haven't met one. There are always great intentions of wearing them again but never happens. I almost did once with some alterations but thankfully I didn't. The attendants at the reception in next room were wearing that dress.

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  16. Congratulations!! So happy for you guys. That Supreme Court ruling was such an answer to prayer.

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  17. What a beautiful post. Congratulations, I wish you many joyful years together.

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  18. Congratulations!! You deserve every ounce of happiness and stress that marriage can throw your way :) I mean that in the best way possible- the fact that gay marriage took so freaking long to become legal in this country is ridiculous. All the best to the both of you.

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  19. long time reader, first time commenter.. Congratulations! Same sex marriage started here (New Zealand) on Monday, it's been awesome to see so many newlyweds around town!

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  20. I've come to your blog many times but not in recent months. What a beautiful post to return to! It made me so happy when the US Supreme Court ruled in favor of marriage FOR ALL and you have added another beautiful personal episode to it. I feel sorry for those who cannot accept equality in LOVE. What poor pathetic lives they must have to want to deny some people the right to marry the person he or she loves.

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  21. congratulation. be grateful that you have each other

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  22. I'm new to your blog and am so glad this was the first post I had the pleasure of reading. Congratulations on your one-year anniversary! It's amazing but I can be certain that many heterosexual couples take for granted all the benefits that you mentioned above of being married. Here's to progress and a society becoming more accepting, more open-minded, more compassionate, and more humane with each passing year.

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  23. Wow, I can't believe it has been a year already! Congratulations!

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  24. How fantastic! Has it really been a year already? I remember reading your post a year ago about your wedding ceremony! Incredibly touching ^-^ It's so lovely that you've been able to marry legally now. Now at least you won't have to worry about the legal malarkey :)
    Congratulations (again!) to you both! I'm incredibly happy for you. x

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  25. I'm so glad you guys get to be legally married now, and what a perfect way to celebrate your Anniversary! Congratulations again!:D

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  26. I've been reading for a while and never commented before, but this deserves a congratulations. I love weddings, and this was incredibly sweet. Congratulations again.

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  27. Garrett, this made me choke up. I've read & loved your blog for years but have never commented. I had to let you know how happy this post made me. Congratulations to you & your husband, and cheers to a long & happy life together!

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  28. Congratulations! I'm so happy for you, and all of us!

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  29. Unfortunately, you degrade the rest of your arguments by laying claim to the existence of tasteful bridesmaid dresses.
    Congratulations anyway :)

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  30. Such a wonderful anniversary - I can't believe it's already been a whole year since you two first got hitched! Here's to many more wonderful years for you and your hubby. :)

    On a side note, I can never seem to find large tapioca pearls at my local grocery (just the little ones for pudding), should I try one of the large Asian markets like Uwajimaya? I love bubble tea, but without the bubbles it's not worth much to me.

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  31. Congrats to you both again!!

    Love your explanation..."only love in that room"

    "It seems gay marriage will help save the economy through tiered cakes and tasteful bridesmaid dresses."

    many happy years to you both!

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  32. Congrats to you both!! What a great way to celebrate your anniversary.

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  33. Congratulations!What a beautiful post.

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  34. Yay! Congratulations! You guys are so cute. :)

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  35. Just found your blog (referred by Amber at Awake at the Whisk)... What a fun blog post to start me off! Congratulations! Here's to more and more "official" love in the world.

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  36. Beautiful! Congratulations! I'm very happy for you both!

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  37. Congratulations!!! You deserve to be happy (and legally married) just like everyone else :)

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  38. Well I hope you managed to remove the coffee stain from that shirt before you got married in it! But seriously, congratulations; wishing many more happy official and unofficial wedding anniversaries to you both.

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Hey, you're leaving a comment! That's pretty darn cool, so thanks. If you have any questions or have found an error on the site or with a recipe, please e-mail me and I will reply as soon as possible.
~Garrett