Moving Update

Saturday, March 29, 2008

This is me. Moving. Without having showered for 27 hours. Only eating pizza. Wearing the same gross clothes. I can actually smell myself. I forgot to use the flash on the camera. And, yes, I licked a gum wrapped and stuck it on my forehead because it seemed like a good idea. But - I am very close to having finished packing. Just thought I would share.

And P.S.: The kitchen took up like, eight boxes. Not including the cadre of crap I have that can't be boxed.

Moving

Thursday, March 27, 2008

So this is my pause post. I don't know for the what time, I lost track after the one with the meth lab next door (not a joke), but I am moving again. That means boxing up all my shit, sorting through the shit I want to keep and the crap I want to donate or throw away, and laboriously loading it into a U-Haul over many back breaking trips.

The said U-Haul I will haphazardly drive, endangering many and giving us all a moment to pause and ponder exactly what hemp smoked filled room of congressmen passed a law allowing any layman with a license behind the wheel of a 1-ton 16-wheeler doom coach.

Through the process I will curse. Ye Gods, I will curse. Those overhearing my dark forbidden words will suffer spontaneous nosebleeds. Children will cry. The elderly will be struck deaf. It will be biblical and ye shall tremble.

Plates will be lost. Fallen into whatever shadowy passages and realms, I know not of. Behind the counter to some distant place of dark nightmares and probably bits of cereal and a few twisty ties. Glasses will be broken, because damn it, whats a set of glasses without one shattered into a thousand fucking pieces?

I will be losing my gas stove. My baby, who has spoiled me. I sadly go back to electric. But I gain new cabinetry and well tiled floors and back splash. Given, it is a galley kitchen, yet I have overcome far more fearful, dungeon-esque kitchens where even the most stalwart and thick skinned cooks dare not brave for fear well understood.

Moving; it is anathema to me.

So, I will be emptying the kitchen. Eating pizza, take-out, and greasy MSG-a-licious Chinese food on paper and plastic. Taping up every bottle of oil and delicately loading it into a box like porcelain dolls, hoping each will survive the trip. Wrapping every goddamn dish in old pieces of newspaper. There will not be recipes. There will be no product reviews (maybe one or two if I can find the stupid port-drive I put them on). No restaurant reviews unless we count Pizza Hut.

If I post, feel lucky. I will try to be back up on the 2nd, or something. Maybe someone will say something stupid at work and I can toss that as a flesh cleaned bone to ya'll. Here's hoping. Of course, any time I ever said I was taking a break I posted anyways. So we'll see.

Then, of course, I need to hope I have the internet up and running when I get there. And then unpack the whole damn kitchen. And everything else...

Fuck.

Anathema. To. Me.

Early Spring Ruby Galette

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Rhubarb! I adore it. The sweet-tart taste, the ruby red color, the sweet aroma. *le sigh*

I had a bit of leftover frozen pie dough (I hate making my own, I dunno why, I just do) so I decided to utilize some delicious looking rhubarb I found. I paired it with some fresh vanilla and some ground ginger and threw it all together for a delicious tasty treat. This isn't so much a recipe as just something I tossed together, but the measurements and method are pretty straightforward.

This is the last recipe for a bit, as I'm moving. Again. So that means packing up everything in the kitchen and not buying any food. So I'll be eating out a lot more the next week or so. Hope ya'll enjoy this! (By the by, no finished picture as it did not survive long enough for that.)

Rhubarb Strawberry Galette
1 1/2 cups of chopped rhubarb
1 cup of chopped strawberries

3/4 cup of vanilla sugar (or regular sugar)

1/2 teaspoon of ground ginger

1 teaspoon of grated orange zest
thawed pie dough or one
pie crust recipe

Preheat the oven to 375F. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper.


Combine all the pie ingredients together in a bowl and let macerate (sit) for about 10 minutes. Drain out most of the syrup that develops.
Unroll the pie dough (or roll out a good circle of your recipe).

Spoon in the filling into the middle, leaving a good inch to two inches around the sides open. Fold in the pie dough and press in to ensure that it doesn't come apart while baking.


Sprinkle with sugar and then bake for 40 minutes or until golden brown.
Allow to cool for 10 minutes. Serve.

Pick and Choose Your Battles at Safeway

Saturday, March 22, 2008

From the archives, a moment I had in Safeway...

Checkout Boy: "Rhubarb is just red celery right? Why would anybody put that in a pie?"

Me: "...It's... uh... no."

Checkout Boy: "I'm sorry, I missed what you said. Paper or plastic?"

Me: *sigh* "Plastic."

Some battles just aren't worth fighting.

...Or Just Beat Them With a Homemade Casserole

Thursday, March 20, 2008

"I don't get you people. Why on earth would you cook something when you can save yourself the time and money and just buy this stuff? Who would want to bake when Save Mart has it already made?"

This is what someone recently asked me. This person is one of those typical people we see everyday. The kind who are grossly overweight, eats fast food EVERYDAY, and is just generally a massive heart attack waiting to happen.

Should you encounter one of these people, here are the arguments I suggest to you.

1) It's More Cost Effective: By buying ingredients, you have the ability to actually make many dishes. When you purchase a microwave pizza, you can only make one thing, the microwave pizza.

Another example, buying a package of "lowfat" Snackwells will get you 28 cookies for the price of $5.00. For all the ingredients you need for a batch of tollhouse cookies, you will probably spend around $8-$12. This includes flour, salt, sugar, eggs, butter, etc. Now while you spent more money, you have enough ingredients for multiple batches of cookies, with each batch giving you about 4 dozen, you already beat out the Snackwells.

Even then, if you don't make hundreds of cookies, you have ingredients for other recipes. Ingredients like butter and eggs are always in use and staples like flour and sugar usually last for long periods of time.

In in the long run saves you from having to eat out all the time. Saving you from eating another McMeal.

Thus, buying for scratch ingredients is a far more frugal approach.

2) It's Fun and Creative: Some of us actually enjoy cooking. It's fun for us. Sure it's not hunting for that last broken potato chip hiding under the couch cushion, but I guess that's a crucial difference between us.

I am allowed to be creative in what I make. Even if I have made it before, it's a bit different each time and I can, and usually do, switch it up somehow to make something new.

I suppose I can see the comfort in dependability with premade food, but still you would think that meat patties in brown sauce and chicken skin from K.F.C. would lose it's charm. Ah well, different strokes for different folks. Of course, these are the folks who also suffer strokes. =P

3) It's Healthier: All that crappy, no nutritional, crazy chemical crap you buy isn't healthy. It has no real health value. It's a wad of grease, fat, and sugar. Deep frying all your vegetables doesn't mean you are eating healthy. There is no argument here. Don't even try. Is it any wonder you struggle to breathe when you move?

4) You Can Make Time: Seriously, cook while you watch T.V.. What are you doing with all your time you can't possibly find at least 30 minutes in your day? Reality television isn't that engrossing as much as it is just gross.

In fact, if you are seeing it as a lack of time due to kids, family, work and so on, I can understand that. Some days, you just don't want to cook and that's okay. But try to involve your family and friends, get them into cooking. Rather than letting the kids watch T.V. show them how the kitchen works and try out new things. It will teach them to be self sufficient in the future and to eat healthier. (The Great Big Vegetable Challenge is a perfect example of this.)

If whoever you are arguing with still insist on complaining about making food from scratch, then at this point your tender grip on sanity is probably lost. Do yourself and the culinary dissenter in question a favor; put the bitch down. Best of luck to you.

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