That Christmas Cheer in Late-November: Chipotle Gingerbread Cookie Recipe

-Classic gingerbread cookies with a delightful, Mexican-inspired kick of chipotle chilies.-

I went out and bought a Christmas tree today. Not a live one, but a good quality fake one. To be honest, I prefer it that way at the moment.

I grew up going to the tree lot every winter with my family and getting a real one. We would go the day after Thanksgiving while everyone else was at the mall fighting to the death over Tickle-Me Elmos and half-price cashmere pashminas. My brother and I would race down the tight coniferous alleyways, slapping into branches and inspecting every Douglas and Blue Spruce in order to find the fattest, tallest, and fullest tree we could. Eventually, we would find it and call over our parents to come see and approve. Then the tree would be hogtied and strapped to the roof of our car. Dad would set it up inside and we would all begin the lavish decoration.

However, these days my dad isn't here to do the heavy lifting. He also isn't crawling under the tree to water it every morning. My mom isn't vacuuming up the fallen needles or cleaning up the bits of tinsel the cat has thrown up. Honestly, I don't have the energy for any of that. It's a pain in the ass.

Personally, I love a good fake tree that can be stored in the closet during the year and be propped out during the holidays. These days you'll find that a high quality fake tree is nearly indistinguishable from a real one. It's almost shocking. My mother went and got a fancy one that, swear to God, unless you touch it with your fingers you would never know it didn't grow in the ground from humble little seed. Given, I do miss coming into a room on a cold morning and having it smell like winter in the high Sierras, but it's a sacrafice I am willing to make.

-The smell of these cookies is just as good as the scent of fresh pine.-

And, yes, I am aware it's November and that it isn't even Thanksgiving yet. I grew up putting the Christmas decorations early so it seems natural to me. I'm like WalMart, I begin to think of stringing up lights and mistletoe before the Trick-or-Treaters have even knocked on the door. BF hates it, but that's his business. At least, there aren't fuzzy, Santa-faced toilet seat covers in the bathroom. Not like when I was a kid. It was like Chris Kringle hosted a Yuletide orgy at our house. Candles, bells, crystal angels, throw pillows... we went all Christmas'd out. I loved it.

Now that all the kids are out of the house both mom and dad do it a bit more tasteful now. Christmas chic. Martha would be proud of Mom's giant tree covered in white lights and designer ornaments and ribbon in gold, cream, and mauve in its many tasteful shades that I didn't know mauve had.

Of course, the reason I had to buy a tree at all this year was because of the fire. It's the only thing I hadn't replaced yet. The fire had happened two days after Christmas so the tree had still been up. It was also a fake one, a high-quality one, with the ornaments and garland in a trendy color scheme of key lime, navy blue, and teal, which I was ecstatic over for the fact that it matched my living room. When I wandered into the wreckage the next day I found my tree smashed onto the floor. Bent and broken, then firemen had knocked it over and in order to get upstairs had continued marching over it. I don't blame them as they were just doing their job, and a plastic tree isn't something they're going to concern themselves with when the roof is on fire. Anyways, everything was destroyed that night and the tree was just another casualty.

As I stood there in the husk of my old home, the carpet black and wet from ash and melted water pipes, I carefully bent down through the wrecage and moved some of the collapsed ceiling off of the tree. I found that a few of the ornaments were still intact. Somehow, miraculously, these big delicate objects had survived the carnage. I picked up one of the big teal glass balls and blew some of the debris and dust off. A little rub and it was shiny as ever, and I could see my fisheyed reflection looking back at me.

-If you want, you can also poke a tiny hole into each cookie and hang them from your tree as ornaments.-

I hurled the ball as hard as I could against the nearest wall. The explosive pop was exciting. The shards tinkled in the air, like diamond dust, and fell to the ground with a hushed applause. I picked up another and hurled it too. And the next one. I laughed as each one burst like a miniature fireworks. My own little bombastic display. It was fun, and I laughed with each one.

It was cathartic. I guess. I'm still not sure what I was thinking then. I know that part of it was enjoying the simple act of wanton destruction. In that roofless room it didn't really matter what I did. I could be a small engine of pure ruination. I reveled in the sound of each delicate sphere crushing into a cloud of colored dust and cheap glass. It felt great to be so damn careless.

How often do we really get to experience something like that? Probably not often enough.

Normally, I wait until after Thanksgiving to put up a tree. This year, I did it earlier. The tree was the last part of putting my life together as it once was. Maybe, I'm just poorly psychoanalyzing myself but that's how it feels. This year, I just needed the tree up and I needed it now.

-Quite spicy, these are best served with a tall glass of milk.-

Still, part of Christmas for me isn't just the tree in your home or the people you enjoy it with. It's also the food. Not every year, but some, my family would make gingerbread cookies. One or two would get decorated and I would pierce the top of the cookie with a ornament hook and hang the cookies on the tree. Edible decorations that added the scent of spiced bread to the room. I loved those ornaments, but I loved the cookies that we saved to eat even more. (We also lost a freshly made plate of cookies in the fire. Ugh.)

These cookies are an adult version of the classic gingerbread cookie. Something a bit more daring and adventurous. A cookie for those with a trendy tree who want to take a small step outside of the traditional holiday treats. This gingerbread cookie is spiced with a hint of chipotle chili powder, a small suggestion I picked up from renowned rock-n-roll baker, Elizabeth Falkner. The chipotle adds another layer of heat and a slight smokiness that enlivens the gingerbread and warms the palate.

The base recipe comes from Kate Washington, a local food writing celebrity here in Sacramento. She, in turn, got it from a random woman named Mrs. Morrissey, whom she met in line in a grocery store. Encouraged that this was the best recipe ever, Mrs. Morrissey gave Kate her address and told her to stop by her home and pick it up. Kate did, and she has never used anything since. I can see why too, it's a flavorful cookie with a snappy texture. A perfect cookie for lighting up the holidays (you know, in a good way).


Chipotle Gingerbread Cookies
Makes 4-6 dozen, depending on size of the cookies.

1/2 cup unsalted butter
1 cup brown sugar
2/3 cup molasses
1 egg, beaten to blend
2 3/4 cups all-purpose flour
1 Tablespoon baking powder
1 teaspoon ground cloves
1 teaspoon ground ginger
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon chipotle powder
1/4 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt

1. In a stand mixer cream the butter and sugar until light and fluffy. Beat in molasses and egg, being sure to scrape down the sides and bottom, until light and uniform.

2. Sift together the flour, baking soda, baking powder, salt, and spices. Mix in the dry ingredients to the butter mixture until the entire thing comes together in one uniform batter.

3. Divide the dough into two equal parts and put them on a swath of plastic wrap. Roughly form each piece into a disc. Wrap well in plastic wrap and chill for three or more hours. The dough will still be somewhat soft for a chilled dough.

4. Preheat oven to 325F. Generously flour a flat work surface and the dough and roll out the dough to 1/4-inch thick; cut into shapes and place on a cookie sheet, preferably lined with parchment paper. Bake for 12-15 min; do not let brown. Cool on the sheets for a minute or two before transferring to a wire rack to cool completely.

-A little fiery kick to help one finally recover from a fire.-

From Sichuan to Tien Tsin

-The flavors of Sichuan, China.-

While I rarely ever post about it I actually cook a lot of traditional Chinese food. It's what I was taught to make by a few Chinese friends and their families way back in college and since then it's pretty much stuck as my go-to cuisine due to its ease of preparation, general frugality, and intense flavor using a limited amount of ingredients.

For most non-Chinese people traditional Chinese food is a bit out of the way as it requires a number of somewhat unheard of or exotic ingredients that will only be used once, usually for a recipe seen in a magazine or on a website that sparked some one-shot culinary gung-ho. Afterwards, the bottle of oyster sauce and jar of chili bean paste is quickly forgotten on shelves behind the olive oil and two kinds of Pam.

The things is is that once you have the ingredients and learn how to really utilize them they become indispensable. I can't think of what I would do without my chili garlic paste, dark soy sauce, or Chinkiang vinegar. They've become part of my everyday pantry, and I use them for any number of dishes the same way another person might wield shallots or vegetable oil (which, incidentally, are also part of the Chinese pantry).

-Molten heat in a tiny package.-

Personally, I've always been drawn to the fiery broths, stir fries, and street side style noodles that the Sichuan (also Szechwan and Szechuan) Provence is so well known for. Chinese food expert, Fuchsia Dunlop, points out a common Chinese saying about Sichuan food: shi zai zhong guo, wei zai si chuan; which translates as "China is the place for food, but Sichuan is the place for flavor." It's a phrase I hesitate to argue against, particularly because the Sichuanese have a particular knack for taking a variety of tastes and weaving them into delicate patterns of flavor. Certain spices like garlic, scallion, star anise, ginger and any number of fermented bean pastes and chilies prepared in any number of ways are key to these carefully layered concoctions. Indeed, Chinese chefs boast twenty-three distinct flavor combinations (some entertaining examples are lychee flavor, strange flavor, and hot-and-numbing flavor).

To cover all these ingredients and flavors would require another blog so I thought I would talk about two of the defining pepper spices of Sichuan style cuisine: Sichuan peppers and Tien Tsin peppers.


Sichuan Peppers
Sichuan peppers are the most distinct flavor that characterize, even define, Sichuan cuisine. These peppercorns are the dried pepper husks of a shrub that grows in Northwestern Sichuan. Their knobby, pink, almost clam shell appearance is distinctive in the spice world. The seeds looks like average black peppercorns, but hardly contain any flavor. The pepper husks are lightly roasted before use to release their oils and heighten flavor in dishes.

For years, the United States banned the import of Sichuan peppercorns because of their potential to carry Citrus Canker, a bacteria that had wiped out scores of citrus trees in China and the U.S. Department of Agriculture was being cautious of. In 2005, the USDA lifted the ban but cautioned that all imported Sichuan peppers had to be pasteurized beforehand.

Sichuan peppers aren't hot in the traditional sense in that they don't create a burning sensation or have a pungent flavor. Rather, they have a woody, citrusy flavor that causes a tingly numbness (think of the buzz created on your tongue from a carbonated drink, or the lingering tickle of Novocain when it begins to wear off). This is caused by hydroxy-alpha-sanshool, a molecule common in the Zanthoxylum genus of evergreen shrubs.

This particular flavor is prized in Sichuan cuisine and is often paired with sweet, salty, and savory flavors but is most often seen mixed with hot chili peppers to create an intriguing layer of heat and numbing which excites the palate and encourages a pleasurable sensation. They are often added near or at the end of the cooking process in order for them to retain their flavor and numbing qualities.

Most people aren't too familiar with the spice the first time they try it and may not know what to look for or how to identify it in a dish. As such they may add too much and overpower a dish making it extremely medicinal and bitter. If you are first encountering a Sichuan pepper try the following experiment: pop a pepper in your mouth and chew it gently two or three times and then spit it out. Wait a moment and then you will notice the lemony, woody flavors followed by a slow, creeping tingle on your lips and tongue. DO NOT chew a few of them for an extended period of time. Seriously, you will hate yourself.


Tien Tsin Chili Peppers
Tien Tsin peppers are named after the province in which they're grown, Tientsin (which is the romanized spelling for Tianjin). The chili is also known as chao tian jiao, or "facing heaven" chilies as they grow pointing upwards. They're short, fat, and a lacquered burnt-red color. They're also incredibly fragrant and have a slight Italian red-pepper flavor which, at the same time, is both quite pungent and musky.

These peppers are sun-dried and quite light, but contain a high number of seeds. Shaking one you'll hear a loud rattle as they violently bounce around waiting to be released. Don't be fooled by their size though, these chilies are extremely potent. While the flavor lies in the dried fruit, the seeds are searingly high on the Scoville scale. Some recipes may ask you to toss the seeds so that the pepper only lends the flavor of the fruit. The seeds are incendiary and if not reigned in with a steady hand can easily overpower a dish.

To use them just snip them in half or grind them into course flakes. For soups and stews many people just toss in a chili or two whole to flavor the broth. Often times people may substitute a Thai chilies which are even hotter and will make a dish inedible. If this is the case use a third of the number of Thai chilies you would use in place of Tien Tsin chilies for a recipe.

-The prettiest of peppers.-

These spices are becoming quite common in Asian markets and can easily be purchased at affordable prices online (I use Penzey's). I encourage you to try your hand at using these spices and giving some traditional Chinese cooking - like Kung Pao Chicken - a shot.

Zihuatanejo Market - A Short Tour

-Fish freshly caught and ready to be sold. They just scream "Eat me!" (Or, most likely, "Holy crap, I'm not in the water anymore!")-

Club Med, Ixtapa is a place of all-inclusive isolated luxury. The outside world simply doesn't exist here where even the most work obsessed can leave their wallet, phone and watch in their room. Released from the grip of news or internet you become perfectly comfortable in being cut off.

Yet once outside the gates and after a thirty minute drive you're overwhelmed by the cacophony of sound, and the color of the buildings and signs is dizzying. You're swept up into the everyday hustle of the crowd, waves of people crashing down and carrying you through the currents of the market alleys. Just a short walk away you're lulled into a blissful stupor of the marina where pelicans lazily waddle past you in hopes of a dropped yellowtail snapper.

-"You have fish for me?"-

Our tour of the markets started at a dozy beachside fish market where fishermen laid out their catches on woven hemp and coconut mats. Stooped over a checkerboard, yellow and white bottle caps cleverly reutilized as pieces, they studied the game with the same quiet analysis they applied to locating schools of fish and hand sewing their broken nets.

The piles of freshly caught fish glistened and each face popped with a look of surprise from their last little fish breaths. Red Snappers with their wide bodies and sharp little teeth grimaced mincingly, while smaller fish that looked like overgrown sardines that our guide called "silversides" were piled high in long rows and were a popular fish for the locals due to their rich, dark meat; a quality in fish that most foreigners find too strange after years of flaky white bass and pink salmon.

-The fish docks of Zihuatanejo, where the sand sparkles from the glassy shimmer of fish scales.-

We soon moved through to the market, a maze of corridors lined with strange and familiar produce, long strings of firey red and bright green chorizo of all kinds, and flanks of meat that were set out to dry. Everywhere the smell of freshly cut offal, nose burning chilies, the salty smell of fish, and sulfury onions strong enough to make you weep assaulted the senses.

Diane became the de facto culinary leader in our little group. She would buy up any inviting meat or bread then before you could react shove it into your hand with the command to, "Try this!" She'd then photograph your smiling reaction as you sudenly discovered food you had never before encountered, capturing you and that perfect taco de lengua con chili verde forever.

-Mincing block at a taco stand. Be sure to watch your fingers.-

We trailed through the covered, crowded aisles tasting and smelling, each of us electrified and overstimulated. At one stall a savory pork and potato stew bubbled in a clay pot. The woman stiring it would then take a small loaf of crusty bread and rip it open then spoon in the stew, pinching the bread shut. The result was a hot, filling sandwich that trickled down your arm and dripped onto your feet. A somewhat contained mess that encouraged you to lick and slurp every warm morsel and crumb off every part of you.

Next was a hot sample of chorizo negro, black chorizo, dark from the use of chipotle chilies smoked until the color of charcoal, a flavor so rich and powerful from the smoke you coughed incessantly. When you breathed back in your lungs and nose filled with pungent smoke and heat, waking your entire body up.

-Tiny berries that are easier to eat than they are to pronounce.-

Fresh arrauanites, berries that looked like green blueberries but tasted like guava and apples dotted the stalls as a snack and palette cleanser. Star fruit that had the taste of Granny Smiths charmed your curiosity. Freshly brewed hot chocolate stirred brusquely with cinnamon was readily available. Each food called you like some sweet and savory siren encouraging you to crash onto the rocks and enjoy them forever.

Finding someone to hack open a fresh coconut was easy. After they poured the milk out in a cup, the inside was deftly sliced away and bagged with rhythmic movements so clean and hypnotic one might normally associate such precision to that of a violinist. Next to them sat bags of sliced green mango sprinkled with sea salt and chili flakes which highlighted the teeth clenching, delightfully sour taste of the fruit.

-Do not get between a group of food bloggers descending upon a plate of mole. We're like piranhas devouring a cow.-

"Everyone come here! Try this!" becokoned Diane once more as she shoved us all into a small booth where soon plates of steaming hot chicken covered in pitch brown mole were served up. The mole was dark and fragrant with chocolate, the rugged punch of cumin and garlic belied a teasing heat that made the chicken somehow glow when you ate it. It was the definition of a perfect food - one you happily drown in and that you realize will set the bar for all similar food the for the rest of your life. The flavor left you radiant in a way no new religion, massage, or hours of sex and yoga could ever do.

-Sweet, delicious, red hot, lip numbing death in a bowl.-

To the side was a bowl of chopped dried chilies, tossed with garlic and oil their fiery color attracted the eyes like a roaring campfire with all the same heat. The taste was intense and my lips and tongue tingled and burned. I was molten and drugged, covered with sweat and in a delirium where pain and pleasure blended into one. I began to dip fresh tortillas into the less spicy mole and then used it to slather up Mexican rice and black beans to help alleviate moments of the joyfully searing oil.

-Beef tacos with onions, cilantro, and lime. Served, of course, with beer.-

Within an hour we were full to bursting, all of us sweating more from the stomach searing spices than the wilting humidity. Still, we were all eager to make last minute purchases of more coconut and green mango to help sooth the pin-prickly sparks of spice that lingered.

-This woman had this fish that was roughly the size of a 10 year old, and easily double the weight, broken down in about 15 minutes.-

The food of the market had unwound us all. We gazed listlessly through the city, walking the rest of the city in a haze marked by bright trinkets and textiles, worsened by many educational tequila tastings and heady musks of Cuban cigars.

As much as I tried to take notes of everything in the most assiduous manner possible I couldn't. Zihuatenejo doesn't do high strung or attentive. It's a town that encourages you to unfurl and engage. You have to simply repose, relax, and let the food unwind you.

-Fresh coconut milk and flesh being prepared. Perfect for fighting off the heat of the food and the weather.-

Shrug Off Your Day With Brownies

-Brownies with Spices and Cocoa Nibs. A perfect way to forget what's bothering you.-

When a six year old child calls you a Nazi, it's proof that there is something dreadfully wrong with the world. I'm not sure what made me a Nazi exactly. I am blonde and blue eyed. I kissed a German boy once, but it was New Years so that doesn't count. Then there's the fact that he was, you know, a boy.

I wasn't sure what to think of it really. I suppose one thought that crossed my mind was, "He's small enough. I could stomp the little gremlin into paste before he knew what hit him." I was compassionate enough to let him live, and by compassionate I mean I like my job and don't want to be fired.

I was actually a little bit pissed off. More so, I was confused. The reason for the verbal abuse was that the office I work at was out of cups for the water cooler. I just happened to be this travesty's messenger. Apparently the lack of a Dixie cup is a grave offense to children these days.

I went back to my desk, more than a bit irked. Really, I was already having a bad enough day, the last thing I needed was some action figure obsessed punk hurling insults at me over trivial things. Then I realized how silly my being pissed over the matter really was. He was a kid who didn't know better, and I doubt had any real grasp about what he was saying. I've certainly been called worse in my life. In the grand schemes of things this fell between mopping my kitchen floor and deciding if I wanted to get up and have Sunday breakfast or sleep in until Sunday lunch.

I could sit there and stew, churning in my own bile and frustration, or I could simply just shrug it off and let go. Over the years I've learned my best tool for shrugging is to go and bake something. A simple truffle to get over any trifle, and what is it about cookies that can make any problem seem so insignificant?

So I went home, got out some chocolate and shrugged off the day. I was going to make brownies.


Spiced Brownies with Cocoa Nibs
This recipe is inspired by Alice Medrich. This brownie is very moist, somewhere between a mousse, fudge, and cake. The spices added give it a nice bit of warmth. The cocoa nibs and cocoa powder add contrasting textures and flavors of chocolate. I highly suggest pairing with a bit of mint ice cream.

8 ounces of 70% cacao chocolate
6 tablespoons of unsalted butter, cut into pieces
1 teaspoon of cinnamon (optional)
1/2 teaspoon of ground ancho chili powder (optional)
3 eggs
1 cup of sugar
pinch of salt
1 teaspoon of vanilla
1/3 cup plus 1 tablespoon of all-purpose flour
1 tablespoon of cocoa powder, plus extra for dusting
1/4 cup of cocoa nibs

1. Preheat over to 350F and line a springform pan with parchment paper (a simple 8 or 9 inch square or circle pan will be just fine). Lightly grease and dust the parchment lined pan with butter and flour.

2. Place chocolate, butter, cinnamon and chili powder over simmering water. Stir together and until melted, smooth, and warm.

3. In another bowl place eggs, sugar, salt, and vanilla together and whisk on high speed for 2 minutes. It should be thick and and light colored.

4. Add the warm chocolate to the egg mixture and whisk together.

5. Fold in the flour and cocoa powder.

6. Scrape the batter into the lined pan and bake for 25-30 minutes or until a toothpick comes out clean.

7. Allow to cool for 30 minutes on a wire rack. Remove springform rim. Dust with cocoa powder and serve. Great with whipped cream, mint ice cream, or chilled cream poured over it.

-Go ahead. Lick the screen. I won't tell anyone.-

Chili Peppers. One Dollar.

-Chilly chilies.-

I love Thai chilies. They're cute. They're colorful. They're incredibly hot, bordering on incendiary. These bad boys will LIGHT. YOU. UP.

I have a warm spot in my heart for these chilies in my cooking (or it might be due to these, either way). Since these blazing peppers are so crazy hot I only need a few each week. When I go shopping at the farmer's market, I only pick up a few for various curries and stir fries I'll make for the next seven days' worth of meals.

Now I like to take heat, but like any average white boy I burn easily in every regard. When it comes to heat from the sun sun I don't tan, but rather turn as red as a crawdad in gumbo. This is followed by lots of peeling and freckling. I then bitch about this to anyone in hearing distance.

When it comes to heat in my food I like to think I learned rather well from my mom, the Tabasco Queen. She can put peppers away like no one's business; it's a trait I've strived to pick up. Still these Thai chilies are something else and more than four or five (seeds included) is too much for me.

When I first started going to the farmers' market I always did a bulk of my shopping at the Hmong produce stall. After picking out everything I needed I would toss a few (read: six, tops) chilies into a bag and ask how much. Whoever was behind the stall would just look at me, smile, and shake their head.

"Free."

While I would normally be thrilled with free produce, the way I was waved off was upsetting. I wasn't getting enough chilies to even bother being charged. There was such pity in their eyes, their voices belied sarcasm and humor. They thought I was a wuss. When it came to taking the heat both in my kitchen and food I was a failure to them. My paltry sum of peppers wasn't even worth charging.

These were pity peppers.

However, since I loved these chilies' fire and flavor I would put up with it. Soon they recognized me and my pattern. Eventually whenever I came to their stall they'd just throw in a few peppers with my bag of lemongrass and opal basil. A prize at the bottom. No charge. I was cute, I suppose. The guy who likes to cook with only a few chili peppers was to be indulged. They'd laugh as they handed me the bag and gave me my change. I'd laugh with them, a bit irked by the encounter and at the same time amused. Free chilies are free chilies, after all.

It was only recently that I picked up a good tip to remedy my embarrassment. When I was shopping with cookbook author and friend Sheng Yang, an expert in Hmong cooking, she suggested I just buy a bunch and freeze them. "It's what most people do," she said.

By god, it was so simple! I could actually pay for the peppers and maintain a bit of dignity. No more, "Free." This wasn't about saving money, this was about saving face.

The next weekend I marched right up to the Hmong produce booth. After I filled a few bags with herbs and eggplants I handed them over to be weighed. The ancient lady behind the booth smiled at me showing the smile lines in her face, a lithograph of her life's laughter. She said hello and asked how I was. "Very well," I said. Her smile widened and she reached to grab a smattering of chilies. I raised my hand and stopped her.

She cheered as I plunged my hand into the produce box of colorful capsicums. I emptied two handfuls into a plastic bag and handed it to her. Her grin widened to match the one I was giving her.

"One dollar."

-Buy in bulk, then freeze for later.-

Habanero Night -or- Why My Roommate Now Wears Glasses

"That'll be 45 cents."

"Here ya' go!" handing the change to the lady behind the table. The huge box of bright orange crumples, which blocked most of her small, mountain-hermit frame, reflected the light in my eyes. I squinted in order to see and reached over for the double bagged package of scotch bonnet peppers, otherwise known as habaneros.

Over the last few weeks I had been experimenting with various chilies; pickling jalapenos, making chili oil for stir frys, chopping up birds eye chilies for curries. Each chili I tried was a new experience, it was interesting noting some of the flavors behind the heat. The vegetal, slight apple-like flavors of the poblanos and the heady scent of the rocotillo all intrigued the senses and scalded my mouth with fiery punishment.

My roommate, Danielle, is far more adept at chili eating than me. While many times I have to race for milk and bread, she simply chomps away and gives me a queer look and responds, "It's not that hot."

So, I decided to pick her up some habaneros to see if she could handle them and to see if I could as well.

As I walked in from the market I called her out, "Bitch! I got you some hot peppers for tonight! Let's see if you can handle these!"

"Oooo! Fun! Can't wait! I'll use them in a spicy turkey ragu!" she beamed. She has a mean healthy streak that inspires odd, but surprisingly tasty dishes. A noble culinary endeavor that keeps me from resorting to fast food some nights (I work full time and go to school full time, get off my case!).

Fast forward to the taste test.,,

"I made sure to choped them up real fine so it should be pretty spicy."

"Um... okay. Well, bottoms up," I said with trepedation, my brain already reconsidering just how smart an idea this was. You could smell the heat, the dish radiated a musky spice whose scent itself caused me to begin to sweat and my nose to run.

We took a bite.

It. Was. Incindiary.

We both chugged out milk down and raced for bread. Our cheeks puffed with dairy soaked bits of corn muffins as we prayed for it to soak up the capsaicin laden oil searing every nook and cranny of our moths and throats.

I choked down the bread and milk, "Didn't you seed and devein it!?"

"No, I just chopped it all up and added it!" Danielle sluged down another gulp of milk. She put it down and began to wipe the sweat from her eyes. I used the back of my sleeve. We were both perspiring as if we had run a marathon.

"Ow."

"What?"

"OW! Oh, it's in my eye! It's behind my contact lens!!! OH GOD! OH DEAR GOD!!!" and she screamed up the stairs like greased lighting and threw her face into the sink and turned it on full blast. The humorous part was she didn't wash her hands before trying to get the contacts out, making a bad problem only far, far worse.

The lessons here are twofold: 1) use gloves for chili pepers, 2) seed and devein your chilies, and 3) if you get habanero oil on your contact lenses you won't get it off and you will be ordering a new pair.

Mango Lime Cupcakes with Neufchâtel Cheese Frosting & Chili Powder

Rob and I have been eating a lot of mango using this method of preparation recently. It's perfect for the summer heat. It's tropical, flavorful, with the littlest whisper of spice in the background. I could think of no better cupcake to put together for Elise's backyard ice cream social (which we will cover in the next post to be sure).

The mango is sweet and delicious in this intensely rich, moist, and dense cake. The lime perks up the cake perfectly. The Neufchâtel cheese is something new; it's basically a low fat cream cheese without that highly distinctive tang that cream cheese possesses. It's mild and sweet, perfect for fruit based cakes where you don't want to overpower or compete with the other flavors. The chili powder and lime zest were a tad bit tame, I think I would add a bit more next time as it seemed to get a bit lost sometimes. It shouldn't be strong, it should just barely be recognizable, almost invisible, but should still be present.

Overall though, I was very happy with the outcome. I was able to share it with all my Sac blogging buddies, and many other awesome peoples. A simple cupcake I plan to make again.

Mango Lime Cupcakes
Makes 12 cupcakes / 350 degree oven

What You'll Need...
1 stick of butter, room temperature
1 cup of sugar
1 egg
1 egg yolk
1 cup of milk
1 1/3 cup of flour
1 teaspoon of baking powder
good pinch of salt
1 mango, peeled and chopped
zest of one lime
1 tablespoon of lime juice

What You'll Do...
1) Preheat the over to 350 degrees. Beat the butter for about 2 minutes until well creamed. Add the sugar and beat until light and fluffy, about 3 minutes, scraping down the sides of the bowl halfway through.
2) Add the egg and egg yolk and beat for 45 seconds. Scrape down the sides and bottom of the bowl.
3) Combine flour, salt, and baking powder and sift together. Combine the milk, lime zest, and lime juice together. Add some of the flour mixture, then some of the milk, alternating between dry-wet-dry and ending with the dry ingredients. Mix together until just combined.
4) Fold the mango into the batter. Scoop into cupcake papers until almost full.
5) Bake for about 15-18 minutes. Cupcakes will be dense, heavy, and moist. A toothpick should still come out clean. Let cool on a wire rack.

Neufchâtel Cheese Frosting
What You'll Need...
1/4 cup of butter (1/2 a stick), room temperature
4 oz of Neufchâtel cheese, room temperature (this cheese can be found near the cream cheese)
2 cups of powdered sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla extract (taste as you go)
lime zest
chili powder

What You'll Do...
1) Cream the butter and cream cheese together, about 3 minutes. Scraped down the sides and bottom.
2) Slowly add the powdered sugar. Add the vanilla to taste. Spread on cooled cupcakes. Sprinkle with lime zest and chili powder.

Sliced Mango with Lime and Chili Powder -&- We're in the Paper!

My God, this is so deliciously shibby it should be illegal. I mean, I'm pretty sure I could commit the very act of murder and then villainously present any witnesses and/or accusers with this dish. They would be so enamored with the flavors that it would grant me time enough to commit the deed again. (Yes, I suppose that villains are defeated in the long run, but they have more fun along the way than the heroes do.)

The mango is sweet, the lime is slightly salty and of super citrusy, the slightest dusting of chili powder gives it a little bit of kick. A formal recipe would be silly and a waste of both our time; you chop up a mango, juice a fresh lime over it, then give it a light sprinkle of chili powder. Done.

A fabu little dish perfect for beating the heat, it meets all of my recipe requirements: simple, cheap, quick, and tasty. Make it for yourself or serve it as a light salad, appetizer, or even dessert. Now, I wonder if I can adapt these flavors to a cupcake?

Or murder. Whichever.
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By the by, Vanilla Garlic was mentioned in the Sac Bee today along with Everything Rachael Ray by Madeline, and Cakegrrl.com by Kristy, and quite a few others! Check out a copy of the article today! There is one large article, and then three individual interviews. Special thanks to Bob Sylva for writing the piece about the Sac food blogging community and Kevin German for the photos. Be sure to check out the other Sac Bloggers too, links located in the sidebar!

Many others were mentioned too, such as Pie is the New Toast, Simply Recipes, Chucrute com Salsicha, and Yogurt Land! Hope you enjoy.

Fojos (Flourless Chocolate Cupcakes with Ancho Chili and Whipped Cream)

So bear with me for a bit, I'm gonna delve into old High School memories and ancient nerdiness of my best friend and me.

Janelle and I have known each other since we were about five, and we've been pretty damn close all that time. Back in our schoolin' days we often took on various art projects for our own fun and amusement, like drawing out elaborate comic books where my little brother would die a horrible death on every page, write stories, or even program 40+ hour role playing games (our first one's website is still up, only 12 hours long for a playthrough).

ANYWAYS, all of our creations always starred ourselves and two of our creations as companions. Mine was Bacon Goddess, a powerful being who spoke in Middle English, wore slutty leather outfits, and had the power of bacon which could turn things into bacon, pancetta, pork belly, etc. or use it to control universal chaos to blow shit up. Fojo was a red haired pyromaniac who loved bombs, had a robotic ferret named M.I.L.O. which turned into a flame thrower and a motorcycle, and often screamed out in joy whenever she set stuff like houses or people on fire.

I wanted to make some food to commemorate these characters whom I still love and adore. A bacon cupcake obviously isn't going to happen (I did think about it though) so I will give her a savory dish at some point. Fojo however, the crazy little vixen, gets a cupcake. I thought of doing a flambe cupcake, but all that butter and sugar but it seemed like a good way to explode myself, but I will revisit that idea later. So instead she gets rich chocolate and ancho chilies attributed to her.

Rich, sexy, and with a subtle-sweet kick, this cupcake is totally yumtastic. Ancho chilies are very sweet with only a little bit of heat and work as the backbone to many Mexican dishes including moles, so the combination of anchos and chocolate has a history of dancing well together. The whipped cream helps calm it all down a bit and lighten the overall texture and taste. By the by, this cupcake is TOTALLY GLUTEN FREE.

The picture of Bacon Goddess and Fojo was done by Janelle. She's a talented artist and if you need to have a piece of clever art designed she's a good person to go to. You can check out her website here. (SHAMELESS PLUG, GO!)

Hope you enjoy the cupcakes, and if you do be sure to check out the Chipotle Cinnamon Chocolate Cupcakes!

Update: I made the Bacon Goddess inspired cupcakes! Maple Bacon Cupcakes with Maple Frosting! Please be sure to check them out!

Flourless Ancho Chocolate Cupcakes
12 cupcakes / 350 degree oven

What You'll Need...
8 oz of semisweet chocolate (60% cacao)
3/4 cup of butter, room temperature
1 cup of sugar
4 eggs, separated, room temperature
2 1/2 tablespoons of ancho chili powder
pinch of salt

What You'll Do...
1) Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Break the chocolate into small pieces and melt it with butter over hot water in a double boiler type fashion.
2) Beat the egg yolks with half of the sugar until light and creamy.
3) Fold in the melted butter and chocolate mixture to the egg mixture. Fold in the ancho chili.
4) Beat egg whites until frothy by using an electric mixer; gradually add the remaining sugar, beating until stiff peaks form. For more great advice on working with egg whites, check out Shuna's post on Simply Recipes.
5) Fold in the beaten egg whites to the chocolate mixture.
6) Spoon into cupcake papers. Bake at 350 degrees until a wooden pick inserted in center comes out clean, approximately 30 minutes. The cupcakes will collapse due to no flour.
7) Let cool for 8 minutes, then use a knife to slowly and carefully work out the cupcakes. They can be fragile but if they break or goosh a bit, whatever. You'll probably need a fork to eat these anyway. Put a mound of whipped cream on and dust with cocoa powder and serve.

Whipped Cream
What You’ll Need...
3 cups of heavy whipping cream
1/3 – 1/2 cup of powdered sugar

What You’ll Do...
Place together in a mixing bowl until big, billowy and holds very stiff peaks.

Vanilla Garlic Chipotle Sauce

After being asked about 8 bajillion times if I ever use vanilla and garlic in the same recipe, I finally decided to post an answer. This recipe comes from the Vanilla Queen and it's pretty tasty. She offers it forth as a BBQ sauce and salsa, but in my opinion this really only works as the BBQ sauce. Salsa wise, it's simply too runny, and uncooked the vinegar still has a bit to much bite. If it's getting too cold for grilling, this works shibby as a marinade.

And the taste? The chipotle chiles add a definite smoky backdrop, the garlic is nice and subtle underneath it, the vanilla gets you a few seconds later at the back of your tongue. It's spicy and sweet. This sauce is definetly different so feel free to customize it as you need. One friend of mine likes to add dry mustard powder to this, another adds some garlic powder. I like to add some shredded green onion for texture and appearance. Expirement with it as you need, and let your taste buds tingle!

Vanilla Garlic Chipotle Sauce
Makes about 1 1/2 cups of sauce

What You'll Need...
4-7 medium chipotle chiles in adobo sauce (use as many as needed for desired heat)
3-5 cloves of garlic (to taste)
1/4 cup of apple cider vinegar
1/4 cup of honey
2 teaspoons of vanilla extract
1/4 - 1/2 cup of water (also for desired heat)
2 tablespoons of olive oil
juice from half of a lime
salt and pepper to taste

What You'll Do...
Place all ingredients in a food processor and blend. Do not wash the sauce off of the chilis.
Puree until smooth. This can be refrigerated for a week.