VG Kitchen Remodel: Edibles Abound

Tuesday, May 14, 2013

-Bing! You have cherries.-

Did you know that a furnace costs about $3000? I do now. For that kind of money you think I could at least get it in a nifty color like ochre or maybe zebra print. But nope, it had to be replaced because the replacement guy was all, "Well, it has to stay disconnected so that means no air conditioning and if you plug it in you risk blowing the place up," etcetera and so on.

I tell ya', it's this kind of things that force feeds me three big helpings of flaming bitch and puts me in such a mood that even Satan won't screw with me.

So yeah, there goes some of my flooring budget. Not sure how I'm going to work that out anymore, goddamnit. This is nothing to say of the surprise duct work that needs to happen and the discovery of the totally broken under the seal guest room window. (We'll be buying cheapest vinyl window I can find. It will be made of old The Monkees records.)

Remodeling is stressful. So much I just don't have the energy to rant about it, which greatly reduces the amount of f-bombs the Internet has to Iron Dome itself from.

But let's talk about some of the positives I have discovered. Most of it edible.

-Mystery grapes.-

First, we have a Bing cherry tree. We get lots of fruit on it and I was surprised by this. Normally, you need a male and female cherry tree. We have the male, a neighbor two doors down has the female. In fact, every model of our house has a cherry tree of differing sex so we all get cherries. Yay for competent city planning.

The dude who lived here also planted potatoes everywhere and we keep tripping over them. Sadly, most are too old to eat now, but it's a novel discovery.

Grape vines line and crawl up every fence post and into every tree. We've been beating with a machete and I half expect to uncover Incan ruins deep beneath the underbrush. I'm not sure what variety they are, but now after a thorough and heavy-handed pruning I hope we'll get some plump and hardy grapes.

In addition, the back yard has an orange tree and a kumquat tree towering high and breathing the clouds. It's a pleasantly unexpected citric bounty and I foresee a lot of marmalades in my future.

-My new marmalade tree.-

We plan to put in a lemon tree, lime tree, variegated apple tree, and a pluot tree. Blueberry bushes have been planted as have tomatoes, chilies, eggplant, and tomatillos.

Demo Update: The broken pipe is fixed. We have a front door. The floor are ripped out. The garage is not longer a rotten mess. Oh, and I have a new $3000 non-zebra print furnace. Grr.

Garrett out.

24 comments:

  1. My furnace died the day after Christmas (the day before my birthday). While the repair guy was in my basement trying to see if it could be resurected he popped upstairs to say "That noise your hot water tank is making? That's the noise they make before they explode." And I was all "yeah, I'm going to get a new one with my tax refund." And he says "You know, we also offer financing..." (When they came to replace it, they drained it, then went to move it - and the entire bottom was rusted. 25 years of dirt was the only thing preventing the water heater from flooding my basement.)

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    1. Yeah, I'm just happy the water heater is still alive. =P

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  2. Wow! Those trees look amazing, at least there's a silver lining!! Do you think you could sell the extra fruit to help with the flooring budget?! :-S

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    1. Not enough fruit in the world. lol

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    2. I bet your marmalades would help though! ;) you could have a lemonade stand but instead of lemonade, it would be marmalade ;)

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  3. I'm sure there's some inspiration on Pinterest that you could find to make your own zebra print furnace. Because, you know, you have all this free time on your hands right now. :)

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    1. I do. See? I'm responding to comments. ;)

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  4. Couple of years ago Jim started getting a lot of headaches and having to take naps during the day. The boys and I were feeling fine but after several days of this I became concerned. I turned off our gas heater and called PG&E to check it out. Sure enough, there was a leak. I call him my "Canary in a coal mine"

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  5. You're so lucky with all the fruit trees!

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  6. Persevere! Great trees.

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  7. Methinks those of us who haven't bought your book should buy it to help finance your renos ;)
    Also I am super jealous for anyone who can grow citrus in their area. Our winters are far too cold to attempt citrus or anything that can't survive Zone 4. Your talk of marmalade makes me want to buy some pomelos at the store and attempt some pomelo marmalade one day.

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    1. I agree, C. Also, do the pomelo marmalade. Sounds nifty!

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  8. I've remodeled my kitchen twice already. It has always started out as exciting then comes the grueling part. Still when everything is set and done, it's worth it!

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  9. ok, so i'm trying to personalize my rental apartment on a fixed {as in almost non-existent} income ~ perfect opportunity to do so because almost everything except what was in the top kitchen cabinets had to be boxed up and put on the balconies while new carpet was being installed since the water heater burst when everyone was sleeping and ran for HOURS. at least as a renter, i don't have to pay for repairs.

    of course, i'm starting with the kitchen so now EVERYthing will be boxed up for a bit. rearranging furniture and plans for a bit of new, trying to get new appliances out of the landlord {i'm gonna paint the suckers if they refuse to replace the 1984 almond frig & dishwasher when everything else is white.} thankfully the new carpet is better than the old and the faux wood flooring in the tiny and even tinier bathroom look good enough, especially if i put a couple of rugs down. i want everything done NOW and i want it done with what i consider quality items, but i'm going to have to do it over time.

    maybe settle for cheaper flooring right now with a few stunning or unique or fun rugs throughout and plan on the flooring you want in a year or two. it ain't perfect, but no one who comes to visit will give a damn. if they judge you on your floors, do you really want them over anyway?

    besides, cherry juice and blueberries are gonna stain anyway. just consider them "disposable" floors. with all that fruit, what you're walking on won't matter as much. i promise.

    dani

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    1. I hope your landlord appreciates all this. Best of luck, Dani!

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  10. My local garden centre (near Toronto, Canada) has started selling potted citrus trees intended to be dragged inside for the winter. They claim that they'll survive and produce (many are tagged as "everbearing"). Maybe there's something similar in your area? For $20, I figured it's worth a shot.

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  11. Nice fruit trees! There's no excuse to not have fruit trees here in Sac. Our house came with an amazing 50 year old apricot, and we've planted a cherry, fuyu persimmon, blood orange and meyer lemon. And of course herbs and a bay laurel. I would love to plant some berries.

    Did you acidify the soil for the blueberries? They have one of the lowest pH requirements of any crop. Coffee grounds lower pH. If you post pictures of the grape leaves, I might be able to ID them. It is important to pick leaves for identification that are 7-10 nodes from the base of the cane.

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  12. Home repairs/maintenance is fun, isn't it? :) I had to replace my furnace the first year I was in my house, and the water heater. My furnace and A/C cost $5000, but I did get a bunch of credits/rebates because it was super energy-efficient. Good news with all of the produce for the future!

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    1. The AC will be done after I will the lottery and/or find pirate gold.

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  13. Someone please mail this man some zebra print contact paper so he can make his furnace into art. ;)
    Good luck, Garrett.

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  14. You are so lucky. My backyard if you could call it that is so small that it will not hold much. If I am lucky I can get some Tomatoes planted. I hope you enjoy the fruits and other edible delights you have growing in your backyard.

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Hey, you're leaving a comment! That's pretty darn cool, so thanks. If you have any questions or have found an error on the site or with a recipe, please e-mail me and I will reply as soon as possible.
~Garrett

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