Insomnia Cure

So recently I had a bad stint of insomnia. I've never really had it before, except once or twice so I wasn't sure what to do. The tossing and turning was driving me crazy and the last day at work had been my one-man show of night of the living dead but with 30% more eating people than on regular workday.

I wasn't able to try any sleep aides because I react badly to them. By badly I mean I hallucinate vividly. Last time I tried a sleeping drug I hallucinated that Eat Beast was trying to kill me. At the time, Rob had found me in the corner shrieking like a banshee trying to back away from the cat who was, understanably, confused by my hysteria. Later on in the night I thought my arm was encased in ice. A side effect of Ambien is that you experience all types of sensory hallucinations, my arm went numb and I couldn't get the ice off. As such I went to the kitchen and ran it under scalding hot water which essentially led to a visit to the E.R. so my arm could be bandaged and covered in burn salve.Needless to say there was a very angry call to the doctor the following day.

With such a painful history with medication I decided to try a more holisitc approach to attack the insomnia problem. Sadly however, nothing worked. Turkey soup, warm milk, nada. I tried reading, running, watching television and even video games (though this one actually kept me up if anything). I even tried to find someone to repeatedly strike me in the back of the head with wine bottle but none of my friends apparently love me enough to risk jail time even if I wrote a note beforehand that would exonerate them from any wrongdoing.

Anyways, after 80+ hours of no sleep I found what works: Billy Blanks and Robert Mondavi. Together they are the cure.

After going to youtube and doing the Tae-Bo Cardio 60 minute work out followed by two glasses of white wine, let me tell you, you'll be out like a light. Throw on your nasty sweats and get gross in your living room then collapse and drink like a fish.

Sure, it probably wasn't a lot of things like smart or healthy, but it worked damnit. Follow it up the next day with three eggs, a stroke's worth of bacon, a bunch of kiwis and oversteeped black tea straight (no cream or sugar, steep for 10 minutes, thanks) and you're ready to recover and take on the world.

Anyone else have a good home remedy involving some sort of food or drink?

Pickled Kumquats

Kumquat season is approaching once again, and Elise and I found ourselves in the familiar pickle. What do you do with a zillion kumquats?

So when life puts you in a pickle, you make pickles.

These odd sounding pickled kumquats are truly quirky when thought about, but in actual taste they are very sweet, very tart, and nicely spiced. The kumquats are quickly blanched, then immersed in a bath of sugar, vinegar and aromatics such as cinnamon and cloves. They’re delicious to say the least, but the longer they sit the better the flavor gets. Tasty on their own they would also pair perfectly with roast chicken, layered in a grilled cheese sandwich, or simply garnishing a simple sald.

After about a week some of the pectin in the seeds and pith and the sugar make the vinegar become a bit thick making the pickles even sweeter and more tart in the syrupy brine. Very tasty and perfect when roasted with some veggies such as kohlrabi.

This little pickling project also falls in step with my food new year resolution: to can more of my own food. I figure this way I can save some cash and make something tasty for myself and friends.
Pickled Kumquats
Makes about 4 cups

2 lbs (about four cups) of kumquats, sliced in half and any seeds easily accessible discarded
water
1 teaspoon of salt
3 cups of white vinegar
1 cup of sugar
4 cardamom pods
5 cloves
6 peppercorns
1 teaspoon of ground ginger
1 cinnamon stick

1) Place kumquats in a pan. Cover with water and add the salt. Bring to a boil, then cover and simmer for 5 minutes. Drain and set aside.

2) Place vinegar, sugar, and spice in a pan and bring to a boil. Add the kumquats. Allow to simmer for 1 minute.

3) Can into sterilized jars. Be sure that the kumquats are fully immersed into the liquid and leave 1/2 in. of head space.

Rockstar Ingredient 2009 - My Top Picks

Last year we were all about the ramps and rhubarb, these two classics that many people knew of but were unfamiliar with took over food blogs. It seemed everyone was trying to use them in one way or another. Still, their time has passed and it makes me wonder what the next Rockstar Ingredient will be. Below are my guesses in no particular order.

Sumac: I'm seeing it everywhere recently. It's a fairly underrated and unused spice in my opinion. Its tart and subtly piney flavors come from the ground berries from a special kind of plant that produces bright red and purple berries which when ground up produce a flavorful spice. You can use it in place of fresh lemon juice or add it for an extra bit of tang in a dish. Often found in Turkish cooking, but the spice grows all over North America as well.

Buddha's Hand: Now that a few green grocers and supermarkets carry them (though very, very poor examples not worth buying) and a few farmers are planting a tree or two, it's now something that you might be able to find. Its floral and sweet lemon flavors make it great for zest, and since the pith is sweet the fingers can be chopped and eaten on their own which are often dipped in sugar first. Plus the name and appearance are more than enough to sway a few people to give it a go.

Wattleseed: With a flavor that's a bit like coffee, hazelnuts, and chocolate this Australian spice is up on my list. More of a dessert spice, it may take a while before people really start to play with it. Mainly because the stuff is still hard to get in the U.S. unless you buy it online.

Cheese: I know I'm being general but I have a hunch that more people are going to start getting into cheese the way some people do about wine. Profiling regions, countries, type of dairy, and developing pairings and dishes utilizing only the best kinds of cheese possible. It's a dairy revolution.

Figs: When the season comes back people will be all over them. All the recent more popular cookbooks have all had figs featured in them; The Perfect Scoop, Urban Italian, A Platter of Figs, etc... It seems that once the season comes back people will probably scramble to them to start learning how to utilize this honey-sweet fruit.

Any other theories or ideas?

*Sniff*

A few nights ago I hit up one of those hip and trendy places where people sip cocktails and wine as they trade gossip and judge the room. Admittedly, once in a blue moon, I like to partake in the frivolity of it all and be a total snooty bitch sipping and judging the rest in my rarely used but always stylin' Banana Republic shoes. As I sat with a friend praising the new knit style that Uggs had been pushing and the delicious little bits of toast and crab highlighted with citron and cilantro we noticed a small murder of glamazons and he-models stroll into the club. Dashingly gorgeous, one couldn't help but stare in awe and be jealous.

"They have to be models." My friend Amanda possesses a unique appraisal stare. Not only can she evaluate the class standing and net worth of a person in under a half-second, she's able to make an unusually accurate conjecture as to their profession with near Delphic precision.

I stared at them. It wasn't a bad guess, in fact it would all add up right. Still, to state it with such conviction and assurance, "How can you tell?"

"Now look..." she took a long sip from her drink and then placed it to her side as she collected herself for the seminar. "Take the guys for instance. The clothes they're wearing are this season's line. All top name brands: Prada, Junya Watanabe, Helmut Lang -"

"I only know of Prada," I said in a matter-of-factly tone.

"Jesus. You suck at being gay. Anyways, each is wearing at least two-thousand dollars worth of clothing and accessories."

"Okay," I replied, trying to absorb the look of the clothing.

"Now notice how good they look? The girls super skinny and eyeing anyone with food but only sipping a drink. The guys have faces with no stress lines and perfect bodies. They have to be models."

"But that doesn't mean anything. I know lawyers and accountants who make bank and wear these kinds of clothes and look that good."

"Yes," she countered, "but they have at least dark eyes, wrinkles, some sort of sign of stress or sleep deprivation. Those people make their money because they work 60 hour weeks and then try to fit in gym time, right?"

She had a point, the wildly successful, gorgeous people I know often were falling apart and their faces would usually show it one way or another. Plus, if I actually could meet them for a night out they were ready to crash by 10:30, and it was already near midnight.

"You make a good argument. Still, I think I need more proof. See that one girl is eating something."

"Oysters do not count as substantial food."

"Whatever. Hold on I'll be back. Restroom. Watch my drink," I excused myself and made my way to the bathroom. "And don't drink it!"

"I promise nothing!" she called back.

As I walked into the bathroom I took a quick minute to examine myself in the mirror. Dark bags under my eyes displayed my lack of sleep, and shallow shadows spoke of lines yet to come that would genetically mirror my mother's. "Damn," I muttered to myself. I guess the stress thing was true, though I was still lacking the Jumanji Wata-huza shirt or whatever.

*SNIIIIIFFFFFFFFFF*

I turned around at the sound. A few sinks down one of the he-models was bent over he sink. I saw his hands fly in rapid chopping motions like a chef dicing an onion. He then jerked his head back and moved it forward in one quick, fluid motion over the now visible tiny mirror.

*SNIIIIIFFFFFFFFFF*

Oddly enough my first thought was where on earth one even buys coke in Sacramento. I turned and left as he shook his head and wiped his nose. His eyes were as big as dinner plates and he looked like he had suddenly drank eight red bulls after being hit in the head with them. I made my way back to the bar to a waiting Amanda who was using all her self-restraint to not drink my cocktail as she stared a hole into it.

"So either it's 1986 or coke is back in style."

"What?"

"Yes, they're models. You were right."

"Oh, yeah. Have to be then, the commoners can only afford meth and weed."

"Yeah. Hey you wanna go grab some frozen yogurt at the Yogurt Monkey? They're still open for another 30 minutes and it's only a dollar."

"Sounds like a plan," she moved to pick up her clutch and we left. I'm sure our seats were immediately taken by some other group of people who were now sipping drinks, trading gossip, and judging the room.

Best Gift Ever

Every Christmas there's always that one present that just outshines the rest. Something that eclipses not every other gift you received, but the gifts everyone else received as well. Well, I got one of those this year.

My little brother is the artistic one of the three McCord siblings. The other two of us... not so much. I'm not an arty person in slightest unless it comes to food in some ways. My brother Brandon, however, can wield an pencil, lump of clay, or brush and do wonders with it.

However, this year he did something amazing for me. He went through the entire blog and combed out the best pictures I had ever taken. Afterwards he had them printed in matte with borders, a normally expensive process but he was able to call in favors. He then picked up a basic stationary set and adhered the photos to them and stamped the back with a "VG" (for Vanilla Garlic).

The result? Unique, one-of-a-kind stationary that uses my own art. Over 200 of them with the envelopes ready to be used for whatever reason.It is amazing to say the least, and really moved me. Furthermore, my brother said he got to know me better after combing through the last 2 1/2 years of postings. It was really quite touching the amount of time and effort he put into it. The end result is simply awesome in the full sense of the word.

That's right. Be jealous.